By Kavitha Kesavan (Content
Management Analyst)
Emotional intelligence (EI) is the
ability to be smart with emotions as it plays an essential part in fostering positive
working relationships in an organization. IQ will get an employee hired, but EI is the ability to interact effectively
while managing their own emotions and others’ emotions that will help someone
move up the career ladder and determine success in life. Individuals communicate better, reduce their anxiety and
stress, avoid conflicts, improve relationships, empathize with others, and
effectively overcome life’s challenges with high level of EI.
An
interesting question and answer by Daniel Goleman is extracted from http://www.danielgoleman.info/social-skills-and-eq
on social skills.
Q: Having good social skills is another component of EQ, but does that mean people who are shy or introverted don’t have as high an EQ? Again, how can one improve social skills?
Social competence takes many forms – it’s more than just being chatty. These abilities range from being able to tune into another person’s feelings and understand how they think about things, to being a great collaborator and team player, to expertise at negotiation. All these skills are learned in life. We can improve on any of them we care about, but it takes time, effort, and perseverance. It helps to have a model, someone who embodies the skill we want to improve. But we also need to practice whenever a naturally occurring opportunity arises – and it may be listening to a teenager, not just a moment at work.
Q: Having good social skills is another component of EQ, but does that mean people who are shy or introverted don’t have as high an EQ? Again, how can one improve social skills?
Social competence takes many forms – it’s more than just being chatty. These abilities range from being able to tune into another person’s feelings and understand how they think about things, to being a great collaborator and team player, to expertise at negotiation. All these skills are learned in life. We can improve on any of them we care about, but it takes time, effort, and perseverance. It helps to have a model, someone who embodies the skill we want to improve. But we also need to practice whenever a naturally occurring opportunity arises – and it may be listening to a teenager, not just a moment at work.
Daniel Goleman, psychologist and
author of the best-selling book Emotional
Intelligence, established the importance of EI to business leadership and defined
five main qualities that make up EI.
Self-awareness
Self-awareness is the ability
to recognize and understand one’s own emotions and moods and know how
this can impact ourselves, others, and our environment. Strong self-awareness
means having a clear understanding of each own’s strengths and weakness and operating
with humility and kindness.
Employees with low level of EI
often demonstrate direct their mood swings to certain colleagues and employees
with high level of EI will be able to understand their colleagues’ emotions and
will be able to accept and accommodate accordingly. This may cause conflict and
uneasiness in a workplace if the employees with low EI are not willing to seek
ways to change their habits as it is difficult to work with such colleagues.
Speaking out with a trusted people who will be able to help the employees and
attending motivational courses will be to assist employees who are keen in the
journey of creating a high EI workplace.
Self-regulation
Daniel Goleman said,
“When emotions are running high, they certainly cannot be ignored – but
they can be carefully managed. This is called self-regulation, and it’s
the quality of EI that liberates us from living like hostages to
our impulses.” Leaders demonstrating EI will keep their worst impulses and
distressing emotions under control and remain stay calm and effective in the
most challenging times, such as during the COVID-19 pandemic. They
will be able to understand the stress that employees face on a daily basis in
global, complex, and high-pressured work environments. An approachable
leader with self-reflection will be able to retain talents at workplace as
they will comfortable and motivated to work with an emotionally balanced leader
and environment.
Motivation
Self-motivated people have a passion
to work with extremely high standards for the quality and pursue goals with
persistence. They are not solely motivated by money or titles, but find the
motivation within themselves. A highly EI team will help improve productivity
of the workplace tremendously as they have a personal drive to improve and
achieve, committed to goals, take initiative to complete a task, and
readiness to act on opportunities, and optimism and resilience.
Apart from self-motivation, EI also includes on how we motivate others in a
team. People with positive energy and vibes often inspire others to be
super motivated, especially during a challenging situation. This will help retaining
good employees, and creating a sense of loyalty which means they are more
likely to work harder for employers.
Psychologist Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy
of Needs Theory is relevant in identifying factors essential for employee motivation.
Usually a person beginning their career will be very concerned with physiological
needs such as adequate wages and security needs to fulfill the basic need
for food, water and shelter etc. Workplace hazards should be addressed and
resolved immediately to ensure employee’s safety is guaranteed and they do not
feel threatened.
Employees desire to work in an environment
where they are accepted in the organization and have some interaction with
others. Therefore, creating a workplace that harbors opportunities for
participation and interaction with others to promote a sense of
belongingness is encouraged.
The need for appreciation and
respect is another important element for motivation. A strong level of self-esteem
can make you feel better and gives a boost to your confidence that can make you
feel empowered and perhaps, even improve your relationships at workplace. Meaningful
job title, job perks, awards, a nice office, business cards, workspace, etc.
are also important to an employee’s esteem.
Self-actualized people seek fulfillment
and change through individual development. Self-actualized employees have
leadership traits and are always prepared for new enhancements and challenges
in relation to their job and are prepared to move out of their comfort zone. Self-actualized
people are humble, not disturbed by small matters and are able to accept
their flaws for growth.
Empathy
Empathy is the capacity to feel
compassion for others, put yourself in their shoes and have an understanding to
help them in times of need. Offering a genuine response to people’s concerns
and connecting with them will be able to retain talents at workplace. Allowing
flexible working arrangements for employees that need to care for kids or
elderly parents is an encouraged approach.
Employees are much more likely to
work smoothly with a friendly face versus someone that’s cold or
unapproachable. For instance, if a new co-worker is having trouble adhering to
a particular workplace culture or policy, co-workers tend to assume that they
are being negligent or otherwise aloof. However, chances are they require time
to adapt to the new culture. Co-workers with high level of EI will
give the new hire the benefit of the doubt, respect their way of getting adjusted
to the new culture and make them feel comfortable in the workplace before
passing judgment on their behavior in the office. Practicing patience with
your co-workers is a key to demonstrate empathy.
Social skills
Social skills are the ability to interact with
others that are considered as fundamental to human development (Odom et al. 1992). Good relationships at workplace will help
people to get along well with others and help to perform better at jobs as they
will feel comfortable approaching their co-worker for a discussion. When you
show respect for others by being polite and using good manners in the
workplace, people will show respect for you. Active listening which means being
fully engaged while listening to someone talk also represent a good social
skill.
Gossiping is definitely NOT
part of strong social skills even though gossipmongers tend to be “friendly” to
get their message through to lower a colleague’s reputation in the eyes of
other colleagues due to their jealousy or insecurity. Gossipmongers are
indisputable cancer in the workplace. Workplace gossip leads to attrition
due to good employees leaving the company because of an unhealthy work
environment. Gossiping tends to erode morale, hurt feelings and reputations,
lowers productivity and creates divisiveness among employees as people take
sides. A rule of thumb to identify gossips would be, “if you would not be
saying that about me in my presence, then it should be avoided.”
Warning or terminating a gossipmonger acts a deterrence to other employees to
respect other co-workers and to keep the positive vibes ongoing.
A workplace with high EI culture encourages retention of employees, loyalty
and improved work performance as a happy and healthy workplace environment is
highly beneficial for employees’ productivity and profitability of
organizations.
(Note: For further
information on workplace ethics in our Asia Pacific Employment Law and
Singapore Hands on Guide - HR Manager subscriptions, contact us at sg-sales@wolterskluwer.com (Singapore)).
